andhowareyou?

comedy & sleep deprivation... that's mainly it.
Jun 08
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My Old House…

Last night, I dreamt about my old house… It’s the third night in a row I’ve dreamt about it. There was a leaking water pipe coming from the garage that progressively got worse throughout the dream. It all seemed kind of dull and I was panicking that the pipe would burst and flood the house.

I even remember the smell.

Jun 05
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Things are getting worse but I feel a lot better.
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The Internet…

…What an utter pile of bollocks.

How many followers do I have on Twitter now? Has someone replied to my Facebook status update?! Will I say something funny today?! What’s this? A new friend request?! Oh my!

Social networking has no longer become a place for us to share links, let others know about events or just chat. It’s defining our social status. It’s boosting our egos and giving us all a false sense of our own worth. I don’t claim to be immune to that either!

I feel like it’s reached a point where no one knows where to take it next. 3.0? 4.0? What version of the Internet are we on now? The one that ruins our social values.

Mar 23
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Brutal Honesty

I feel like the only way I can be truly honest is to be brutally honest. I’m talking about saying the things people are scared to say in case they offend someone. The things people hold back from saying but they still think. The jokes people don’t make because they’re ‘too much’ or ‘too soon’ but they still cross their minds. 

I thought about not posting this… in case people get the wrong idea or the wrong impression. Deleting the post and pretending it never existed wouldn’t be honest though.

This isn’t a thought I’m done exploring.

Mar 06
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Father, Time steals our days like a thief. There’s no price that I wouldn’t pay to get some relief. I’ve become an empty shell of a man I don’t like so well. I am a living, breathing hell… Come on and resurrect me.
Nov 10
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The old grey donkey, Eeyore stood by himself in a thistly corner of the Forest, his front feet well apart, his head on one side, and thought about things. Sometimes he thought sadly to himself, “Why?” and sometimes he thought, “Wherefore?” and sometimes he thought, “Inasmuch as which?” and sometimes he didn’t quite know what he was thinking about.

Oct 05
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Money doesn’t make you a proper driver.

I was recently watching Fifth Gear… because that’s what you do when you don’t work through the week. They were reviewing a car, quite expensive as I recall. The reviewer said… “This really is a proper drivers car”

I disagree with that. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be writing about it, would I?

I disagree with that because people with a bit of money will now think “oh, ok… so, if I buy that car I’ll be a proper driver too then? Great!”

Too many motorists with money get the idea that because they drive a more expensive car, they are therefore a ‘better driver’.

That’s all I’ve got on the subject for now folks.

Aug 31
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In case you didn’t get the mildly comical undertones of my latest post entitled ‘Early Morning…’ here’s a video that may help to highlight them a bit. :)

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We’re shagged… We’re absolutely shagged!
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